Once upon a time, there was a blogger with a forelock of chemically-enhanced yellow hair who loved nothing more on weekends than to idly peruse the Period Property section of the London Telegraph. She would sip her tea and daydream about which country house she would purchase on the day she received word that an aged and unknown benefactor had bequeathed her his fortune.
She liked this one but it was too big.
(Welcome to Great Maytham Hall in Kent, England. Marvelous, isn't it? Frances Hodgson Burnett thought so. During her stay here in 1898, a robin led her to a rusty gate nearly hidden by ivy; on the other side, she discovered a walled garden overrun with roses. Years later, she wrote a book about it. Yes, that book. It's since undergone an apartment conversion; private flats start at £245,000.)
She also liked this one, but it was too small.(Interested? It's a timber frame home built especially for members of the canine persuasion, replete with mortise-and-tenon joints, antique beams and an authentic thatched roof. The antique glass windows are kept in place by -- wait for it -- bone-shaped latches. The house is currently occupied, but the book, "Barkitecture", is available to all.)
Then she saw this one and thought it was just perfect.
(And...breathe. Isn't it to die for? Built in 1822, it's called Hill House, it's in Norfolk and it's for sale at £595,000. It boasts a sweeping driveway, classic Georgian details, a secluded walled garden and endless lawns apparently "bursting with copper beech, oak, yew, holly and apple trees." Can you see Emma Thompson and Kate Winslet in the upper windows? No? Squint harder.)
I'm giddy with love. Who's going to buy it and invite me over?